While Virginia has temporarily redeemed itself from it’s number one H8ST8 status with its election of Democratic governor Tim Kaine and even more shockingly by going blue for the first time since Johnson in the 2008 election.

But if you’re trying to secure unemployment compensation from them, they’re still patronizing assholes.

Since this is the first week that I’m actually receiving benefits, I received a letter in today’s mail, fully set in 16-point Times Bold all capitals. Some excerpts:

THE VIRGINIA EMPLOYMENT COMMISSION STAFF RANDOMLY VERIFY WORK SEARCH CONTACTS EVERY DAY.

EACH WEEK THE VEC MATCHES REPORTS WITH CLAIMS BEING PAID TO DETECT UNREPORTED EARNINGS.

FAILURE TO COMPLY WITH THESE REQUIREMENTS IS CONSIDERED FRAUD.

Insert sarcasm: It’s nice that the H8ST8 doesn’t treat me like a criminal, and that it believes I’m honestly filing these claims.

Mr Hope invited me over for dinner last night. He big poochie, Elsa, was also there (he has shared custody) and she was excited to see me. I was glad she was there too.

Mr H served tasty pork chops, even tastier couscous, green beans, bread and wine. We mainly talked about new jobs, old jobs and what color our parachutes are. It was a wonderful way to spend an evening.